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Articles in the Movie Reviews Category

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[17 Mar 2010 | No Comment | ]
Thirst (2009)

Dear foreign people,

Stop making boring fucking movies.


Phantom Troublemaker…

Movie Reviews, Reviews »

[12 Mar 2010 | 2 Comments | ]
The Final Destination (2009)

I don’t hate the franchise that produced this movie. The original Final Destination was a fun, original movie. I can’t say it’s one of my favorites, but I do own it and have definitely watched it more than once. I groaned along with everybody else when the second one was announced. Did this premise really need to be revisited? Yeah, it did. Final Destination 2 gave us one of the most memorable opening sequences since Saving Private Ryan. Think I’m exaggerating? Go watch it right now and then try driving down the interstate without becoming extremely nervous…

Movie Reviews, Reviews »

[24 Feb 2010 | No Comment | ]
Star Trek (2009)

J. J. Abrams again shows himself to be a master storyteller who has one hell of a story to tell. He made a movie that is gripping, insightful, imaginative, and compelling. He makes us form opinions about the characters and to WANT things to go one way or the other. Watching this film is not a passive experience. Abrams made this into something that sucks viewers in and makes them want to KNOW what happens next. . .

Movie Reviews, Reviews »

[22 Feb 2010 | No Comment | ]
Hancock (2008)

While HANCOCK might not sound like a superhero name, you quickly get used to it. The primary thing the movie has going for it (beyond Charlize Theron) is that it’s a little different. It’s not “different” in the bizarre or surreal way that movie snobs require when you use the word, but it’s definitely different from most movies of the genre…

Movie Reviews, Reviews »

[17 Feb 2010 | No Comment | ]
Zombie Strippers (2008)

This movie has one thing going for it right off the bat. Remember how just the title of Snakes On A Plane made people decide whether or not they wanted to see it? Same thing here. Don’t like zombies? You’re on the wrong website. Don’t like strippers? Hey, I support single moms. Do you see? If you actually decide to watch the movie, you already know that you will at least like the IDEA of the movie…

Movie Reviews, Reviews »

[10 Feb 2010 | No Comment | ]
Halloween 2 (2009)

After months of anticipation I finally got to see the result of the grueling sixteen hour day that I worked on the set of Rob Zombie’s Halloween 2. It was about five minutes of action in the middle of a bunch of other stuff. Here’s what I thought of it all…

Movie Reviews, Reviews »

[5 Feb 2010 | No Comment | ]
Iron Man (2008)

How do you cast Tony Stark without Robert Downey Jr.? Anybody who knows the Marvel Universe and knows American pop culture KNOWS that the character Robert Downey Jr. = the character Tony Stark. They’re the same person. You can’t not have Robert Downey Jr…

Movie Reviews, Reviews »

[1 Feb 2010 | No Comment | ]
Dance of the Dead (2008)

Last year, here in Atlanta, a film was made that is near and dear to my heart. It’s Dance of the Dead. A high school prom is attacked by zombies and the only people who can save the attendees are those people who couldn’t get dates. How beautiful a setup is that?…

Movie Reviews, Reviews »

[27 Jan 2010 | 3 Comments | ]
Unbreakable (2000)

First, let me acknowledge how amazing The Dark Knight was. It was amazing. Heath Ledger wasn’t overhyped, he was actually that amazing. Amazingly, Gary Oldman wasn’t underutilized this time around. Christian Bale, even with all the hoarse whispering, is still the best Batman evar. The script (and its execution) was sophisticated. Amazing as it was though, it’s not the best superhero movie ever…

Movie Reviews, Reviews »

[26 Jan 2010 | 6 Comments | ]
Six-String Samurai (1998)

God bless Netflix. I sign up, I spend ridiculous numbers of hours telling it which movies I like and don’t like. I rate the movies it sends me, I watch movies online, I get put onto new and interesting things…