EPISODE 1: MEET THE SURREAL HOUSEMATES

"Tammy Faye snorts when she laughs. Ron dyes his hair -- All of his hair. Ponch fell on hard times after C.H.i.P.s. and went overseas to find work. Vanilla is like whoa, and in case you didn't hear, he's like whoa."

EPISODE 2: A SURREAL DINING EXPERIENCE

"You've got the Preacher, the Pornstar, the Ponch, the Pop Star, the Party Girl, and the Princess, all trying to get along in the tackiest house Los Angeles has to offer."

EPISODE 3: SURREAL LIFE TAKES THE STAGE

"Finally, after a rocky start, the play starts moving along fairly well. By fairly well, I mean this is the worst goddamn thing I've ever seen but at least they seem to be remembering sixty percent of their lines."

EPISODE 4: THE SURREAL PORNO POOL PARTY

"Traci bitches about them eating meat while decked out in a leather hat and belt. She relates Vanilla eating a cow to him cooking and eating his own daughter. Take note, people: Vanilla Ice is actually on the rational side of an argument!"

EPISODE 5: SURREAL IN THE NUDE

"Vince [Neil] states that they all stay in touch and speak on a regular basis. As he says this, I wonder out loud 'Even Corey?', and then Ron echoes my sentiments. Vince then replies with a hearty 'No'. Ouch."

EPISODE 6: A SURREAL FAREWELL

"I respect Vanilla Ice about ten times more than I did going in to this thing. Of course, any multiple of zero is still a zero, but I gotta say that he grew on me. Like a rash, maybe, but he sure did better than become the Corey I figured he would."