Man, oh man. I am bushed.

The holidays are finally over, and I'm worn out. I apologize that there hasn't been more than an article once a week or so, but it's been a hectic last few weeks. Now that the yuletide season is over, my day job has kicked in to high gear, and I'm even more worn out than I was come Christmas Eve. But not to worry...I have some very cool stuff planned in the weeks to come, so stick around. Remember, for those of you who use a newsreader, you can subscribe to the MCFTR RSS feed by copying this link into your newsfeed, and you can stay abreast of all the lasts goings on and what not around these parts.

A couple of sad notes, as two fine character actors passed away recently. First is 86-year-old actor Patrick Cranshaw, best known for his turn as Blue in Old School. Also departing our world recently is the inimitable Vincent Schiavelli, best known for his roles in Ghost and Fast Times at Ridgemont High.

Look for some best-of-the-year stuff soon. Hope you are having a happy new year. Before I go, I leave you with this sign that was found not at Dragon*Con, but rather at a local Mexican Restaurant. I was in a sweater and jeans, so I wasn't allowed to go in:

- posted by Noel @ 1:26 PM

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Not a whole lot going on, but a few notes for you on this fine day.

First off, Note that to your left, you'll see the all-new MCFTR RSS feed available. Yes, you can now subscribe to this very site and get notifications whenever there is a new update. Add the feed URL to your news aggregator and enjoy. You can also count on seeing a few other features being added to the site that will take advantage of the RSS technology.

Also, I want to thank whoever purchased the Koday Easyshare camera and also the Ipod Nano from Amazon via my links. You're helping to make it a much happier holiday season for me.

Speaking of which, I hope everyone is enjoying the Star Wars-themed holiday celebration this year. I know that the updates have been slower than usual this year, but I've got a few tricks up my sleeve for the course of the next couple of weeks, so stay tuned. Hey, go ahead and add that RSS feed, and you'll know when MCFTR has new material! Ain't technology something?

In case I don't see you before then, happy Life Day!

- posted by Noel @ 9:59 AM

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Okay, a few quick things:

It's Saturday night. I'm at home. A few years ago, that would have depressed me to hell and back, but these days it's par for the course. Besides, I had several hours worth of G.I. Joe cartoons to watch plus Jason Lee was hosting SNL tonight, so I had plenty of reason to stay home.

Next, I'm sorry it's been so quiet here over the last couple of weeks, but I updated the site twentysomething times in October, so lay off me for a minute. Next week, expect some material from seven years ago that has never seen the light of day but will still embarrass the (Newlywed) Chad a decent bit. Then, the day after Thanksgiving, our Holiday fun starts rolling. Trust me, you'll want to stick around for it.

Thirdly, EVERYONE NEEDS TO GO TO MENTALLY INCONTINENT AND BUY THIS BOOK. My good friend Joe just published this thing in the same week he became officially unemployed, so he could probably use the help. Otherwise, I just know I'm going to see him sitting on a milk crate at the corner of Forest Parkway and the I-75 exit ramp on my way home from my lunch break and I'll be forced to give him my spare change.

Finally, Sangria is pretty neat and makes me happy that Blogger has a spell check built in. By the way, did you know that Blogger flags the word "Blogger" in the spell check function? Weird.

- posted by Noel @ 10:22 PM

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BRAAAAINS!

See, I told you that we'd be doing something special real soon for Halloweeners. Now that we're knee-deep in zombie maaadness, I hope to see everyone checking back every weekday for a brand new update from now until the end of October. That's right -- five weeks of daily updates, and all on the subject of Zombies!

So check back often, and don't forget to wipe your brain at the door.

- posted by Noel @ 12:31 PM

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I hate to use the phrase "calm before the storm" with the current state of affairs in the world and all, but it really kind of fits here. Lately, the frequency of updates here at MCFTR hasn't been as high as it has been in the past, but that is soon to change.

And change it will.

As veteran readers know, Halloween is a pretty big event here in the world of MCFTR. A couple of years ago, in 2003, we went to an all-horror movie format for the month of October. Last year, we took it a step further with our tribute to Troma. And this year, we're planning something big. And while I don't want to spill the beans just yet, I'll just let you know that it'll be something that the staff here at MCFTR has really been able to sink its teeth into thus far.

So make sure you check in during the last week of September for MCFTR's 2005 Halloween celebration. Trust me, you won't be disappointed.

- posted by Noel @ 7:35 AM

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And from the obscure celebrity death file...

Rest in Peace, Admiral.

I guess that's what he gets for coming out of hyperspace too close to the system.

And I'm just sad that I didn't realize that he was also Hitler in Indy 3.

- posted by Noel @ 10:17 PM

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Fan Mail? From some Flounder?

Okay, I never intended this part of the site to be a place to post the more amusing e-mails I receive in feedback to my site, but this one just was too good not to post. I guess I'll start from the beginning. Here's the e-mail I received:

From: Julie Morningstar
To: fortheretarded@mindspring.com
Subject: "Retarded" is okay? What about "Nigger?"
Date: Aug 19, 2005 11:56 AM

Since you have no problems using vulgar and foul
pejoratives, why don't you start a web site with the
work "nigger" in it?

Julie M
Stars of the X-Files TV Schedules
http://tv.groups.yahoo.com/group/x-tv/calendar?s=2&t=1093888728
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/x-tv/
__________________________________________________

Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
http://mail.yahoo.com

Nothing I haven't seen before. Well, at least most of it. This is, however, the first time someone has equated the name of my web site with a racial slur. Normally, I have a standard spiel that I copy and paste into a reply when I get this kind of mail. It uses parts of the disclaimer from the "About" portion of this site as well as some other basic information. But today, for some reason, I decide to toss the old e-mail address into Google to see if this person has bothered anyone else before. And, quite frankly, I was astonished at what I discovered.

You see, Ms. Morningstar, if in fact that is her real name...

you see...

she...

get this...

wait for it...

no, really...

she writes X-FILES EROTIC FAN FICTION.

...

I'm fucking serious. I mean it. I didn't think that such a thing ever had a reason to exist, much less draw enough interest to make it on to the web. But sure enough, there it is.

An excerpt, if you will:

Skinner asked, "What are you waiting for?"

"Hell if I know." Alex snapped.

Skinner chuckled then, a deep rumble that shot straight to Krycek's cock. "I'll open the door. Lock it up, will you, before you come upstairs."

And he did. Followed Skinner's directions to a "T", cursing himself as a fool the whole way. He found Skinner in his bedroom. Naked. Lying on his bed. Stroking his cock, staring at Alex through heavy lids. "You going to watch me? Or join me?"

He pulled off his clothes, then swatted at Skinner's hand. "I'll do that," he said.

And he did.

- From http://www.squidge.org/~xchick/julie/keepsakes.html

By the way, do not click the above link unless you have a strong stomach. And unless you're really brave, do not click the picture of Skinner in the bath.

I decided that this needed a special reply. The standard just would not suffice. So before taking my lunch break, I popped off the following response for the creatie Ms. Morningstar:

I was going to reply with my standard cut-and-paste job about why the term "retarded" is not offensive, and then add my own bit about how ridiculous it is for someone to equate that to using a racial slur that I can't even bring myself to speak or even type...

...but then I realized that it wasn't worth my time justifying myself to someone who writes EROTIC X-FILES FAN FICTION.

You sick, depraved freak.

But thanks for reading! Hope you enjoy the site! Sorry that there aren't enough stories about Agent Skinner's cock for your liking!

Noel Wood
Webmaster, Movie Criticism for the Retarded
http://www.fortheretarded.com

I did receive a reply, and am considering replying back to her, but I'm still trying to wrap my head around the fact that she's calling me out on anything. But I'm sure that eventually I'll compose myself enough to compose a reply.

- posted by Noel @ 2:14 PM

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