New article today. And yes, it's really an old article. Bobby's BATMAN AND ROBIN review is the latest "lost article" to be transcribed by yours truly. With work getting a little busy and the holidays looming, I'm kind of strapped for time to write new material, but with this stuff and the upcoming Holiday revamp there should be plenty of good stuff yet to come.

I did manage to catch SIDEWAYS at the local art theater this weekend, and I may try to squeeze out a review of it this week. I shared a theater with Andre 3000 from OutKast, or at least someone that looked and dressed just like him. The movie was good, which means it's harder to write a review, but I'll see what comes.

Hope you're ready for Thanksgiving. I'm not. I'm also wondering why the hell I am putting myself through working three jobs over the holidays again this year. I must be a masochist.

- posted by Noel @ 1:09 PM

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Man, this "Lost Articles" project is gonna be a lot more intensive than i ever expected.

I just went through all of the found material and seperated the stuff that I need to transcribe, and realize that it's actually more of the original stuff that is on the site today. However, some of the articles originally made it but have somehow been lost to the cosmos since. I still plan on transcribing them again just to make you people happy.

Do you see what I do for you??!!

Another cool thing about these old articles is that originally, we were not "Noel Wood", "Bobby Jones", and "Chad Shonk". We were "Goofus Paludis" (or simply "G. Paludis",) "Gene" (or "G. Gordon Gene",) and "Chad Shonk" (well, I guess that name works all by itself.)

This is gonna be fun. There's lots of good stuff within, and I realize now that most of it was originally written by Chad. This isn't out of any premeditated smiting or any lack of respect for Our Man in Hollywoodâ„¢, but it's just that the guy wrote goddamn novels on that word processor in that lonely little video store.

Sorry Chad. Back in 1998 when I was originally converting MCFTR to an online entity, your 12,000-word essays weren't exactly condusive to my hunt and peck lifestyle.

Anyway, more is coming. Look out for much more from stupid viseo clerks who think they know it all.

- posted by Noel @ 10:50 PM

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joethepeacock (4:22:29 PM): the only thing i wonder, really, is how did the transformers keep their windows from shattering?
fortheretarded (4:24:06 PM): it's a space-age polymer that only LOOKS like glass
fortheretarded (4:24:11 PM): or something
joethepeacock (4:25:02 PM): mm hmm
joethepeacock (4:25:11 PM): the REAL geek answer would have been "transparent aluminum"
fortheretarded (4:25:32 PM): i thought of that
fortheretarded (4:25:39 PM): cause they use that in nascar and stuff
joethepeacock (4:27:02 PM): oh shut up
joethepeacock (4:28:52 PM): just admit that you know a line from a star trek movie
fortheretarded (4:29:00 PM): no
fortheretarded (4:29:04 PM): i don't
fortheretarded (4:29:19 PM): i've never seen a single star trek movie
joethepeacock (4:29:23 PM): shaddup
fortheretarded (4:29:34 PM): swear to spock

- posted by Noel @ 1:43 PM

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I overslept this morning, and it was all Napoleon Dynamite's fault.

I was having dreams that I was in the mythical land of Idaho hanging out with him and his bizarre family, but I don't remember much of the dreams. I do remember that I kept hitting my snooze alarm because I needed more time to track down my own "Vote for Pedro" shirt, and the radio announcers that wake me up were pissing me off.

I really hope there's not some scary deep meaning to all of this, because quite frankly, having John Heder's face hanging in my subconsious is really starting to disturb me.

If I had had this dream a little over a week ago, I probably would have voted for Pedro. I now wish that I could have gotten a "Vote for Pedro" T-shirt before the election just so I could wear it to the polls.
- posted by Noel @ 10:26 AM

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I can't tell for sure, but MCFTR looks a little bit different today for some reason. I just can't put my finger on it.

- posted by Noel @ 11:04 AM

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In case you had any doubt, this season of the Surreal Life will be the last I'll be covering here at MCFTR. The first season was such a fresh idea, and the inclusion of resident MCFTR punching bad Corey Feldman was enough to warrant its coverage here. The second season started slow, but would up being even better than the first. But this most recent season has sucked ass. No chemistry between the housemates, with the exception of Brigitte and Flav, which is just disturbing. But to make it worse, this is what we have to look forward to next year:

Adrianne Curry. Da Brat. Chyna. Marcus Schenkenberg. Jane Weidlin. Christopher Knight. Verne Troyer.

The requisite reality chick is from America's Top Model? Does anyone really remember Da Brat well enough to justify her on this? Chyna's not a bad inclusion, as I've been high on the idea of a pro wrestler on the show, but I could have found someone more interesting. Who the FUCK is Marcus Schenkenberg? Jane Weidlin is nice because I had a crush on her growing up, but she's looking a little rough around the edges lately. Peter Brady is okay, I guess. And Mini-Me? Well, despite the fact that he's supposed to be a world class asshole and he'll be there for the whole freakshow element that Manny Mo provided in season one, he really doesn't grab me.

So yeah, this sucks. And they're shoving this thing at us as early as January, apparently. I do believe that this show has jumped the shark.

Plus, this totally fucks up my only reason for caring to write the final synopsis of this season: the whole speculation part of it. Thanks a lot, VH1.

- posted by Noel @ 9:50 AM

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Since you people are always hounding me to update this part of the site more often, I'll go ahead and make my obligatory post-Halloween post now.

I want to thank everyone who stuck around for the Troma Tribute this year. I would have iked to have done more, but a few key pieces didn't fall in place and I started running seriously short on time in the last couple weeks. I do want to thank Justin for his contributions in the last week. Guy's a regular workhorse! But anyway, I hope everyone had a great Halloween and didn't wind up eating any razor blade-laden apples or poisined raisin boxes. I do have to post my attention-drawing costume from this past weekend, as well as a few more that keep it all on topic here at MCFTR. Here's to ya:

Hail Skroob!

Kurt Russell and Kim Cattrall, eat your hearts out!

Paul and Ace love it loud.

Those wacky pseudo-incestual Tenenbaums!

I want you to hit me as hard as you can!

As you wiiiiish!

Uh, you got some red on your shirt.

Thank you, and goodnight. And remember, November 2 is election day. Vote early, vote often. VOTE QUIMBY!

- posted by Noel @ 1:21 PM

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